A Review of Trash Weed Gummies

It can get you there no matter where you get it from.

I was halfway to my boarding gate at Denver International Airport just beyond the TGI Fridays and not quite to the Cinnabon when the drugs began to take hold.

“Well, turns out those were absolutely some good ones,” I thought as I passed another Hudson News where I hoped to have a book on display someday, which might be possible if I stopped doing irresponsible things like partaking in copious amounts of the Devil’s Lettuce. I could’ve tried (probably in vain) to write hunched over my laptop perched on a tiny tray table during my three-hour flight back to DC, but instead I was going to spend it stoned out of my fucking gourd, hopefully not asleep on the shoulder of a complete stranger.

But luckily, as aforementioned, the marijuana had begun to set in and so I was momentarily (and thankfully) relieved of my feelings that if I didn’t kick shit into gear I was going to die an abject failure.

“Who wants to have the next Great American Novel on a shelf at an airport anyway when you can get high as fuck instead?” I thought, eschewing the absolute fact that having only one of these things and not the other is not et all how the literary world works. I mean, I’ve read some of Ken Kesey’s stuff, all of Hunter S. Thompson’s and also about 200 other authors who definitely partook to complete excess and were not at all shy about it. (I don’t know what it is, but something tells me Nicholas Sparks owns a gigantic bong. And even if this is not true, I will continue to believe that it is.)

I made my way, as is customary, to my gate. I do this every single time I fly. I’m not really sure why, but it provides some sort of comfort to see the place I know I have to be when it’s finally time to board. I don’t want there to be a chance of my getting lost out there.

By the time I doubled back a few gates to meet my friend and colleague Brandon at a wine bar, I was almost fully zooted.

I should back up.

I was already kinda high on life when Brandon and I dropped our rental car off at the airport early that morning.

We’d had a long production trip and what amounted to essentially a free day in the Denver…